Let’s talk lockdown love life. Whether you’re living with your partner or unable to physically and emotionally connect due to lockdown rules, you might be having difficulties in your relationship.
Whilst we can’t fix your problems from one blog post (we would if we could!) we have some useful tips to try and make life a little easier for both you and your partner.
It’s natural for any couple to have arguments but being thrust into a lockdown where you’re spending 24/7 with one another. Communication is key, and so is understanding how to communicate in a productive way. Understanding that it is rarely ever productive to get your message across whilst angry, so if you can take some time apart from each other at that point it will be a much more fruitful conversation. Whether that means going for a walk or being in separate rooms for a while until you have both cooled off.
IDENTIFYING YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE
Are you an introvert or an extrovert? It seems like an odd question to ask when talking about relationship woes, but it’s helpful in understand the needs of your partner. Introverts get their energy from being alone, as being with other people can often be a tad exhausting for an introvert, so to revitalise they may need some alone time. Extroverts are people who mainly get their energy from being around other people and don’t necessarily need as much alone time as an introvert would. It’s helpful to understand that your partner may need some alone time by going for a walk, or spending some time doing things they enjoy. Equally if your partner is an extrovert they may need more time with their friends (via video right now of course) or spending their time covering with colleagues and friends and wanting to spend some quality time with you. It’s about finding the right balance, which may take some time but it’s worth putting the effort in!
UNDERSTANDING WHY YOU ARE UPSET
It’s easy to have an off day and miss your friends, get bored during lockdown and find it difficult to cope without normal social interactions, so when you are feeling like this and your partner says or does something that would normally be a small thing, you react with more anger than you normally would (sound familiar?). Don’t worry, we’re all in the same boat and it happens to the best of us, but it’s about being aware of this and trying to take some time out before blowing up at a small situation.
ARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS REALISTIC?
Think about what you need from your partner and what you’re getting. Are they matching up? It’s helpful to consider whether your relationship is having difficulties because of lockdown or because you and your partner are having differences regardless. It may be time to consider whether relationship counselling is for you. Relationship counselling doesn’t always have to be at breaking point, like any therapy it can be used as a preventative measure.
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